Fighting monsters on a moon should not be as tedious as waiting to renew your health card.

WARNING Spoilers Ahead!!

If you’re looking for a game to play after finishing the epic that is God of War Ragnarök, you will definitely feel letdown if you choose The Callisto Protocol.

As the year’s pattern of hit and miss continues with the newest game from the creator of Dead Space, those who are purchasing this on next gen consoles may feel a sense of ire after seeing more than $100 go down the toilet.

In fact, you may get more satisfaction by tossing the money in and watching as it’s flushed away.

What was promised as a truly terrifying experience fighting mutant monsters on Jupiter’s second largest moon, has ended up being a disaster bigger than the outbreak in which protagonist Jacob Lee finds himself.

Lee and his partner Max Barrow deliver items between Europa and Callisto. Their story starts off finishing a run while arguing about the job. Lee seems to think that this last job will net them enough to never have to work again.

As cliches go, things always turn bad when someone claims it’s the last mission.

They are then boarded by a group of alleged terrorists and the ship gets damaged in the encounter, forcing them into an emergency landing back on Callisto.

With his partner dead on impact, Lee is immediately arrested and becomes the latest inmate of Black Iron Prison, being taken in alongside Dani Nakamura, leader of the group who boarded the ship.

After being implanted with a device given to all prisoners, Lee passes out and awakens in hell, except this isn’t the hell normally experienced by those who go through the prison system, this one includes an invasion of mutants.

You’re thrown right away into the trenches as you work alongside other prisoners to battle your way to freedom.

When the fighting finally starts, so too will your disappointment.

The combat system seems to have no real direction. Your tools are minimal and weak, the guns given – even a shotgun – doesn’t seem to have any stopping power, and trying to dodge is more difficult than getting a coffee from Tim Hortons on campus after 3 p.m.

There is no indication of when combat is going to start or end, with monsters often falling from the ceiling or crawling out of a mysterious hole and lurching towards you. Even when it seems like it’s finally over, more just appear silently to keep the unholy party going.

Though perhaps some players will find random attacks from all sides to be nice practice before spending time with family during holidays.

While this obviously adds to the fear the game was supposed to provide, there is no real terror being instilled on the player.

Maybe if this was a virtual reality game and you were playing through the eyes of Lee, this would be different. However, the only scary thing seems to be how easily one can waste their money on a game as blah as this.

Healing yourself becomes as much of a challenge as quickly trying to switch your weapons in combat – basically it’s not happening.

You would think that someone who is fighting for their life would move a bit faster than a jogger on a bright summer’s day. Yet, Lee seems to move with all the enthusiasm of an earthworm left out to dry in the heat.

The only bright spot on this darkened moon seems to be the PlayStation 5 (PS5) DualSense controller.

Whether it’s the motion of a fan overhead, the swing of your electrified melee weapon, or the trigger pulls of those guns which can end up being more hassle than they’re worth, you can feel everything.

You’re put into the shoes of Lee, and you get to experience every disappointing and enraging moment with the help of the PS5.

With no big-name games left to release this year, let’s look forward to 2023, with the hopes that we’ll be able to forget the year of duds like Overwatch 2, Gotham Knights, Sonic Forces and now The Callisto Protocol.