Welcome to Earth! Now what?
Unlike the childhood dream of “when I grow up, I’ll know everything,” the reality is that being human means navigating a path full of uncertainties. Growing up, we realize that we need to face ourselves and deal with our emotions, experiences, and relationships on our own.
But you don’t have to go it alone. Special Topics in Being a Human: A Queer and Tender Guide to Things I’ve Learned the Hard Way About Caring for People, Including Myself – the longest title ever – by S. Bear Bergman offers a practical guide to tackling the big challenges of adulthood.
Sensitive and difficult topics like how to make big decisions that align with your values, how to have a disagreement without it turning into a fight, and how to handle criticism (and how to tell the difference between real feedback and pointless insults) are just a few of the issues addressed.
Bergman is an educator, public speaker and author of nine books, the founder of Flamingo Rampant Press, and a frequent consultant on equity and inclusion for businesses and governments. T
his book emerged as a collection of the most common questions from his Asking Bear column. For over five years, people asked him tough questions about their life challenges, and he selected the ones that allowed him to share particular pieces of advice.
Throughout the chapters, you’ll find advice with clear motivations and step-by-step instructions. Bear’s queer perspective as a trans man adds depth to the understanding of vulnerability and how to respond to others. As you read, you’ll often hear Bear’s voice, sharing personal experiences and mistakes, making the advice even more relatable. After all, it’s not an untouchable guru giving you advice—it’s someone who has been through similar things, often reacting poorly, making mistakes, and learning from them, offering guidance rooted in lived experiences.
If you’re not a regular reader, maybe a book with more than 200 pages might seem daunting, but good news: topics are broken into small chunks of information and illustrated by Saul Freedman-Lawson.
This dynamic between text and images makes the book feel almost like a graphic novel, lightening the deep themes despite the serious topics. The language is informal and fluid, almost like having a conversation with a trusted friend. Plus, at the end of each chapter, there’s a summary of what to do, in a checklist format, ready for you to save and use.
Special Topics in Being a Human is an important read for anyone looking for a clear and kind approach to navigating your feelings and relationships throughout life.
Thinking of giving it a shot? The book is available in the Toronto Public Library catalogue (both online and physical versions).
